Anyway, without further ado, here is the first letter I received:
Dear Dr. Lauren,
My mother is a real bitch. Bi-polar, two faced, ect ect ect. I can't stand her. I know I won't have to see her often starting soon, due to getting married and moving into my own apartment. How do you suggest I handle her in the mean time?
I would like this question answered in the style of Original Sound trash, possibly sounding like their #1 hit, "Large Intestine".
Groupie #1 happens to be a good friend of mine and a big fan of my band. "Large Intestine" is a song that has only been heard by about three people. But I digress. Here is my attempt at a musical response:
Okay, so the advice itself is probably on the lame side. Sorry Groupie #1. Hopefully you like the song. If not, I can always just record a reprise of "Large Intestine" for you. (Yes world, that song is really about digestive organs. It was written very late at night. There's a reason only three people have ever heard it).
If you are confused by the term "groupie" and want to know what that means, you are in luck! Someone asked me a question about that and I plan to shed some light on it in my next post. Stay tuned!
And if you are in need of some advice in the form of a song, don't hesitate to ask. :)